We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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