whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
then he tried to convert me to islam
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
