I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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