its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
