I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
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