with your own penis?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
