I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
