Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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