??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
