I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize