how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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