He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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