I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
