oh god the rape fog is back!
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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