Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize