I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
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