I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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