I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
