I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
