Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
