Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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