if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
