Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
