i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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