Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
