I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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