Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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