Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
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