i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
