I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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