singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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