Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
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