I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
