The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
