Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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