Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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