You don't have asthma, your pregnant
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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