You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
