just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
