I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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