good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
