ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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