He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
