you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize