I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
