Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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