yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
