Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
