hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize