So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
