We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
